Shitposts Weekly

Medium articles neither rare nor well-done for the week ending 14th July 2018.

How to use Decorators with Factory Functions: A webshit shits webshit about functionality that is significantly less shit in other languages. Explained: function annotations the shitty way you have to do it when your language doesn’t have syntactical sugar. Also explained: why JavaScript still has the factory function anti-pattern. Not explained: why anyone would willingly subject themselves to this shit.

10 Interview Questions Every JavaScript Developer Should Know: A webshit talks about how to hire premium webshits. The author asserts that it’s not easy to Google the answers to these questions, but doesn’t ask any questions that can’t be answered by regurgitating O’Reilly.

People Don’t Buy Products, They Buy Better Versions of Themselves.: A late-stage millennial shitposts about capitalism and branding in the age of social media. It is indistinguishable, save for the mention of social media, from shitposts about capitalism and branding from yesteryear.

The Most Important Skill Nobody Taught You: Solitude and boredom are underappreciated, writes a self-help newspaper curator whose money comes from ads. Much babbling ensues on connectedness versus solitude, without any exploration of what, precisely, the man that sparked this article might have been doing in solitude. One presumes the author doesn’t actually introspect as much as they think they do.

You Might Not Actually Be Struggling With Depression: A professional shitposter shits out a post about a new word he learned, under the mistaken impression that apathy isn’t related to depression, which is totally not a mental disorder that comes in many forms including the one described here. Do not seek therapy from professional shitposters.

10 Signs You Shouldn’t Have Kids: A comedian draws a series of pictures. My only point of disagreement is that the comedian chose to conflate paedophilia with child molestation, a viewpoint that makes it harder for paedophiles to seek treatment in order to avoid offending.

How to write a full-length book when you have a full-time life: An autobiographer fortunate enough to have an Ivy League education talks about how to write in one’s copious free time.

Rare articles which are well-done

The Delicate Bargain of Trust: A literary award magnet talks about his issues with trust and, particularly, how he learned how to evaluate trustworthiness. This article is a rarity: one actually worth reading.

Stop Making Sense: A webshit points out the absurdity of the webshit ecosystem’s project churn, an inevitable consequence of political efforts to make everyone programmers.

How I Fully Quit Google: A journalist talks about quitting Google, and documents the process. Unfortunately, many of the alternatives cost time or money to implement, particularly email, because the internet has adopted email as a de facto identity marker equivalent to national ID numbers.